I need me some Vitamin D

It must be the lack of Vitamin D that we seem to be getting...
For these past few weeks, the cycle seems to ease up on me... I find myself in much a happier state, it has been real nice. My friends have even mentioned how much they see myself doing much better, and for that time being I really was. Things began to really look up, till Sunday. I rear ended a guy, on accident... it wasn't big, minor scratches and two holes...i got yelled at and basically all hell broke loose.

Trying to think positive is hard, especially when the atmosphere limits you to do so. But you deal, and things turn out. God will take care of me... I just need to continue to trust in him.

I leave for MO Friday morning, I was pretty excited... but now, it's just blah. I'm looking forward to doing some serious praying. I'm going to take advantage of this time, and dedicate to Mother Mary, and Jesus. Despite all that has happened, I owe my life to them... I return Sunday, and then the following week I am off to Kansas for Camp Training. I'm excited, but nervous. But Im going to go in with an open mind... so, we will see.

Last weekend, I got to do Love- N- Share, a non profit organization founded by my friend's mom. I like to think I'm a very observant person, I observe others, and who they are, and there personalities. All weekend, I really got to open up to my youth group leader, and connect with her on a personal level. It was really nice, as we sat down and spoke about our dreams and aspirations I got hit with reality all over again... I use to contemplate about my future work for the money? Or do something I know I'm good at? Hm... obviously the good outweighs the bad... if that is truly what God wants me to, then I'm going to do it. If i can serve him in anyway, then I shall. She brought up, that sometimes we are often afraid to leave our nest, and how we choose to stay in our comfort zone rather then soaring our wings... it made all that much sense. Life is great at home.. but what if I'm missing out on something else? I want to consider all the opportunities that come my way. ( Just a thought) The founder of Love N Share, is actually my mom's friend... she's a great lady. I truly admire her... and everything. Her daughter is my brother's friend, she's a really sweet girl... whom i think is trying to change herself for the better. HEr mom brought up some stories, and for that time... i could relate. I got to spend some time with her, and in some ways, I can see a lot of me in her. If thats true, I know this girl will grow up to be something great. Kinda ironic, when Tim left me, her bf broke up with her... I think deep down somewhere we knew and could really relate. Minus our age difference. I started to realize that if I don't want to dedicate my life just helping children, but to be able to touch the hearts of many youths in general. If I can, that would be a dream come true...

There's a lot of things, and certain people who really bother me, but then I think whatever. I have my own life to worry about... as far as the love life goes, for the most part I'm very content. Although, at times I find myself wishing I could have some of that affection or that guy's attention... but only time will tell. There's someone I have in mind, but he and I we are just I don't know.... we will see where life takes us I suppose.